Wednesday, September 22, 2010

I Wanna Get Married

I can’t believe I’m even saying this, but I want to get married. I promised myself growing up that I would never attach myself to someone and let them “control” me in that way. However, after being with my boyfriend for a year, I am completely sure that he is the man I want to be with for the rest of my life. I’m sure a lot of people may think that 21 is too early to know something for sure, but I’ve never been more positive. Everything with Chris has been like this. Even before we were dating, I knew he was right for me and the one. I didn’t want life without him. He makes everything better, everything fun and exciting.
It’s just so crazy to me that I actually even have this on my mind. I never thought I would feel this way. You see, I have major trust issues, since growing up with my mom and seeing what she went through and how she treated people. I really thought that the only person I could count on was myself and hid my feelings and pushed everyone away. I realize now that it’s okay to want someone in your life, open up to them and bring them closer. Being alone just isn’t for me. He makes my life better and I want him a part of my life forever.
That’s what I realized, there’s a difference between feeling you NEED someone and just LIKING them in your life. That’s how I know things are right with him. I know I don’t need him but I want him around me.

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